Thursday, September 22, 2011

Let's be honest

i love lists!
i love to write lists.
i love to check things off my list.
i have lists for 'to do.'
i have wish lists.
i have work lists.
i have books i want to read lists.
i have 'you should clean this on this day lists.'
you would think i would be rockin' organized since i love lists so much, eh?
and you would be wrong. so very, very wrong.

and you would be wrong simply because... i also have a terrible knack for losing things and forgetting. so a lot (or most all) of the time, that means, my lists are lost along with all of those fantastic things i've written on them. i know, this poses a problem. as lists need to be kept up with for the things ON the list to be checked off; which strangely, is another thing i love about lists. so, i've decided to start keeping these lovely lists on my phone. i never lose my phone and it rarely leaves my hands (except for when i am typing, like now, but it's sitting right next to the laptop. judge me, if you must.) yet, keeping lists on my phone takes away the tangible feel of having a paper list in my hand and carefully writing the things down on my list and therefore, also not being able to physically strike through a task accomplished.

it's ok if that just made you nervous and think of me in a completely different way. i'm cool with that notion. now, in honor of my love for lists. i will now compile a virtual list full of some every day observations. we will call it, Let's be honest.

::ahem::

Let's be honest:
- no one likes to poo in public. that is why there are multiple bathrooms in office buildings. this way you can pick your 'secret bathroom' for those times you just need to be alone. it really stinks (hahahaha) when someone else is occupying your secret bathroom when you really need to utlize it's privacy features. i tend to walk out when this happens to me and return when all is clear.
- thongs are not made for comfort. if you disagree, you are a liar. there is no way that having an all day wedgie is comfortable. and don't tell me, "it's like it's barely there!" again, you are a liar.
- no one on this earth can eat chili cheese fritos without getting the chili cheese 'dust' all up in their grill. you will have little specks of red and black and brown in your teeth. i promise. try it. now. go. i'll wait.
- taking your coffee cup to the bathroom with you is gross. i don't care how clean you think the bathroom you are entering might be; it is full of nasty. i won't go any further with this one, except to say, do you want all that nasty in/on your cup? no, i don't either.
- movie theatres are breeding grounds for germs and lice. they. just. are.
- what about a public bathroom wall wants to make someone want to wipe their boogers on it? again, this is gross. pick your boogers all you want. just don't put them on public display. (credit to my friend, S, at work for this one. apparently this is more of a problem in the men's room.)
- it amazes me that not all cars driven in the USA are made with blinkers. i have encountered a rather large number of these vehicles, recently. you know the ones... you are patiently waiting with your blinker on to turn into traffic and then the oncoming vehicle makes a turn without notice and almost hits you. or the one where you are happily driving along at 55mph and the car in front of you rapidly slams on brakes and turns into a parking lot? yeah, those cars. where can i buy one of those?

my time at work is done now, but i promise you...this list will continue. tonight even, maybe. post a comment of your, 'Let's be honest' observations. i know you've got some.

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