Friday, March 1, 2013

fairy tales and make believe

When did you have the conversation with your kids?
The Santa one?
The Tooth Fairy one?
The Easter Bunny?

The conversation where you tell your little person that you have basically being 'keeping tradition' alive, but not really cause it's all a sham anyways. Norah has lost seven teeth to date. This last one, she casually tells me that she thinks maybe, just maybe, that I am the Tooth Fairy and that I just put the money under her pillow while she is sleeping.


I didn't address the question. I simply asked if she really believed that was true. She said, she might, she was still working it all out in her mind. And now, it's been a few weeks since then, and I am thinking, maybe I should have just told her. I've been feeling a little guilty about keeping up the sham (she's lost another tooth since that question) when she's probably got it all figured out.

Does the guilty conscience come from essentially lying to her?
I dunno, really.

Mostly, I worry about her imagination, the ability of her to believe in something...magical. But, it's really not the commercialized holiday's that make her imagination believe in something magical, is it? No, it's not. Magical comes from her own mind, not what I helped her get excited about. She creates entire worlds on her own; with and without books. She plays make-believe with her brother, crafts new games, draws imaginary worlds. She really is magical all on her own.

Should I worry about her being angry or upset?
How did you deal with this stage in life?


  1. I think that if your child brings it up specifically, having obviously thought it through on their own, that it's perfectly okay to come clean; heck, I think it's GOOD for them. They've obviously put their critical thinking faculties to use in some way ("How would a fairy be able to fly? How could Santa make it to ALL the houses with ALL the children in the world in one night?"), and they should be rewarded with the truth.

    It doesn't have to be a disappointing thing. My son is 9 and has yet to call my bluff on Santa or the Tooth Fairy, but when he does, I fully plan on saying, "What a smart guy! You're right; Mama's been leaving presents/swapping your teeth for money, but you figured me out!" If he asks why or seems disappointed, I think I'll ask if it was fun for him or not. The truth of the matter is, Santa nor the Tooth Fairy really exist, so if I hadn't done my part, well, he'd have never had the excitement of waiting for all those presents under the tree or leaving cookies and milk out, or knowing that when your tooth came out that you'd be getting some money the next morning . . . it's just all in good fun, but because they grow up and get smart, they eventually have to figure it out. But it doesn't have to mean that the money or the presents have to end. They just have a more realistic idea of how they get there.

    1. I think the next time she brings it up, we'll have the conversation. She still has little brother to help her get excited about these moments, ya know? And you have brought up a very good point, I AM PROUD OF HER, to have gotten it all figured out. I just didn't think she'd be so damn smart at 6!